In Fields of Reflection

Emotions run raw and painful
just below the surface of my skin:
now prickling with intensity, now barely perceptible…
yet always lurking,
rearing their head in unexpected moments
like a sudden gust of wind,
a thorn pricking my flesh,
glass shattering on the hard ground.

Breaking the silence,
they beg to be released.
Yet distraction is what I have continued to choose:
anything to prevent me
from quieting my mind,
as if avoiding thoughts of you
will somehow spare me
from finally having to say goodbye.

But today I feel beckoned
to summon my courage
and wander
into fields of reflection;
to allow my heart to break
as I embrace the reality
that I will never see you again
this side of heaven.

I can still hear your whispered, “I love you,”
the phone held to your lips
just hours before you left us.
My mind replays
our last hurried embrace,
that sparkle in your eye,
your tender smile,
despite your own pain and suffering.

Always hopeful,
ready to encourage,
looking beyond yourself.
This was your greatest gift to me
(though you gave
so many,
so freely;
could I ever count them all?)

It is that part of you
that will always live on in me;
a sweet reflection
of God’s own heart:
as Father and Mother,
nurturing,
building up,
speaking life.

And now,
at last
as I linger here
in these fields of reflection,
I understand
that yes –
it is a place of weeping,
of releasing.

But it is also a space
for gathering and cherishing,
celebrating,
and being thankful;
for drinking deeply
from the cup that you poured for me
over and over again
throughout my life.

So goodbye for now,
and may we meet again soon
in fields of reflection.

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
Psalm 147:3

O Essencial



Saí de casa
para comprar alguns “essenciais”
mas minha alma
deu um desvio
E me achei
respirando
aquele ar salgado
dançando na areia
salpicando nas ondas
rindo
vivo
regenerando
e relembrando
o que é
verdadeiramente essencial


What Is Truly Essential

I left the house
to buy some “essentials”
but my soul
took a detour
I found myself
breathing in that salty air
dancing in the sand
splashing in the waves
laughing
living
regenerating
and remembering
what is truly essential

My Delight, My Song

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Photo by Nicolás Torres – http://www.jnicolastorres.com

My hunger for you is insatiable
Ever before me, like a whisper on my tongue
And you hear it, even before it is given utterance

Though my heart is prone to wander
Easily distracted, struggling to focus
Your thunderous voice breaks through

Sharp as an arrow
Yet tender as the touch of a child
Surrounding me, filling me with rapture

Where can I run from your presence?
Light that pierces my darkness
Joy flooding my parched soul

Your love is better than life itself
My every cell celebrates your goodness
Praise you, Jesus, forever and ever!

Inspired by my awesome God through Psalms 63 and 139, the Bible

 

Your Secret Garden

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I feel a tender breeze caress my cheek
as you gently whisper in my ear,
“Come away with me to deeper places!”

I sense the still coolness in the sacred well
that you’ve been digging within me as decades pass,
where holy, life-giving waters dwell.

You transform my pain into beauty, collecting every tear,
returning them to me as so many wild flowers
swaying in the wind on that verdant hillside
where you wait for me.

Selah

You Alone

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Photo by Whitney Rae Hurst

No matter how deeply
I may be cut
I will still bleed hope

These veins
though weary
are daily refreshed
by the One
who gently courses
along their pathways:

Red with passion
cleansing
releasing
convicting
discerning
restoring
igniting

And though
the turns of this world
drip
drip
drip
like acid
on my heart’s chambers

You speak:
“I am”
“Be still”
“It is finished”
And realms unseen
fall to their knees

I am desperate
for you
for you alone

Suddenly

Rambling down dusty trails through the pine forest,

Swerving to avoid potholes,

crisp moon illuminating our way.

We reach our destination and tumble forth,

silent desolation broken only by the crashing of waves on the shore.

Not a soul in sight.

I take off barefoot running across parched wooden planks,

arms outstretched above my head, 

salty air licking my face, 

pungent smell of fish in my nostrils,

celebratory scream escapes my throat.

And I’m free.

Free from the expectations and norms,

the sadness and the “ought to be’s”!

Free from pain and scrutiny and decorum!

Laughing as my feet touch the cold sand

that squeaks beneath their weight,

I race for the water.

White froth, shocking chill, gasp for air.

I stare up at the stars piercing through the night sky, 

winking at my childlike giddiness.

And my soul is refreshed.

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